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It takes far more maturity than most 12- to 16-year-olds have to see that words and actions need to match.
Train your teen to look for outward qualities that indicate inner character, like a good reputation at school, a self-controlled mouth, and wise driving habits, to name just a few.
Bill smiled and probed: “You know, your mom and I have been talking about you and all those boys who call on the phone.” Julie squirmed uncomfortably in her seat. Instead, we are encouraging our girls who are still home to focus on the friendship side of their relationships with boys.
Realizing now where this conversation was headed, she rolled her eyes. When our girls do spend time with a boy, it’s in a group, not one on one.
It takes time to discover those qualities about a person and even more time to see if they are enduring or just a pretense.But he wasn’t ready yet to surrender his role as a parent. Just what role should parents play to steer a child away from the traps in the most popular sport for many teens—the dating game? For us, dating or courting is a small part of the overall process of determining God’s will for discovering your life partner in marriage.He hoped the conversation he was about to initiate would help close that gap. ” he asked, struggling to disguise the wobble he felt in his voice. Bill gripped the steering wheel and shot a glance into her eyes. Bill and his wife had talked before with Julie about God’s standards about sex, but soon she would be dating and making moral choices on her own. They were just a block from home, so gently but firmly, Bill pressed the final question: “Well then, would you mind telling me how far you intend to go? ” He stopped the car a few feet short of the driveway and feigned a look into the mailbox. If he had waited for a month, he wouldn’t have been ready for what she said. In our family the focus has not been on dating, but more on training our teens in their character and in how to develop a relationship with the opposite sex.In junior high, teens don’t have the discernment to know if a friend really is a Christian.They believe that if the child says he is a Christian, then he is.Inner character can’t be seen at first sight, across a crowded room, when you say your first hello.Teens need to be taught that the ultimate purpose of dating or courting is to find someone to marry.Whom they should date As a starting point, we believe our teens should develop friendships with and eventually date only other Christians (2 Corinthians -16).Why go out with someone who does not have your values?In the fading twilight, the headlights of an approaching car reminded Bill to reach for the dashboard and turn on his lights.As the horde of rush-hour cars streamed by, Bill reminisced about the teenage daughter he had just picked up from band practice.