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About 3,600 members of the program married last year, Since its inception, the SDU says 50,000 Singaporeans have been married through its offices."The government isn't holding guns to people's heads it recognizes that marriage is a deeply personal choice,'' says Pamela Pung, an SDU spokeswoman."This is just a way of widening the circle of opportunities."Ms. But if you’re looking for an intentional, God-pleasing game plan for finding a future spouse, Joshua Harris delivers an appealing one.
The response for many educated Singaporean men, officials say, was to seek out less educated brides at home, or find them in China, hoping that they will accept traditional gender roles."A lot of our single women today have their own jobs, their own careers, and they are demanding more," says the SDU's Ms. "That doesn't mean they should be doomed to being single."One ethnic Malay graduate, who asked that his name not be used, sees it differently."SDU Single, Desperate and Ugly,'' says a thirty-something woman in a miniskirt and an open-backed shirt."Those guys are geeks the government doesn't think we can do better on our own,'' says another young woman."You kind of get fed up sometimes with all the hand-holding. And the government is not our parent."As with an overprotective parent, many young people think the government is out of step with the times.But to many Singaporeans, the SDU's focus on "educated" singles is nothing short of social engineering: an effort to preserve the current racial balance between the city's Chinese majority and the Malays, who tend to be less educated.The SDU provides subsidized mixers, trips, and computer matchmaking services to college-educated Singaporeans.It is easy to see why: The SDU's publications frequently read like advice for the lovelorn written by a bureaucrat.For example, the SDU published a new brochure last month, called "The Chemistry Guide: When Boy Meets Girl,'' focusing on the overworked, the shy, and the "cosmetically challenged." The guide reminds hopeful singles that "Skin-care products are must-have investments" and "There's no bigger turnoff than a foul mouth, reeking with leftovers from lunch!Finding the loving, committed relationship you want shouldn’t mean throwing away your hopes, your integrity, or your heart., Joshua Harris —the guy who kissed dating goodbye—makes the case for courtship.But if the imbalance between taxpayers and retirees continues to grow, the government worries that the welfare system will be strained to the breaking point.On the other hand, the government fears that relying on immigration to close the gap will dilute a sense of nationalism in a city-state dwarfed by neighbors Indonesia and Malaysia.